Over a year ago in 2016, I started my own writing project: “Question of the day”.
It had been unpublished and gathering dust. It’s time to revisit and revive this! Here’s my first entry from September 2016:
9/5/16: The exact day and year is unknown, and probably not as important, but what I can say is this: I recall feeling tired of feeling trapped, tired and lost. I was alone, insecure and frustrated for so long. I realized that I had brought all of these things onto myself. After all, I am the authors of my own life story and I am responsible for how my life unfolds.
I was always isolating and distancing myself from what I always–deep down inside– always wanted and idealized. I was full of fear and insecurity with no hope for support, acceptance, love or help…I was afraid of criticism and judgment from those who I really respected and cared about…So I hid and ran away…
But it was time to shift my focus. Each day, I try my best to focus on the good. To find joy in gratitude and choose love, not judgment, fear, conflict and insecurity. It’s always a challenge, but I am grateful for every piece of enlightenment and opportunity to do my best right from my heart. Naturally.Even if my efforts or state of
Even if my efforts or state of being makes no sense, remains unknown or is unseen by anyone else but me…Enough of the fear, negativity, conflict and pain…At the end of the day, I take ownership of my own thoughts, feelings and consciousness. Doing the right thing (whatever that means to me) is the point of it all.
Feelings of being stuck, unloved, misunderstood, forgotten, incapable, fearful and hopelessness have bombarded me…
I realized this is not the real me. I am actually vibrant, creative, confident, ambitious and loving.